Sunday, January 27, 2013

The Nitty Gritty... My Goal...

Well, it's Sunday at 6:30 and for some reason I'm awake! Amazing how on the week day my alarm goes off at 6:00 and I hit snooze until 6:15ish or the baby wakes up before then but on the weekends when everyone is sleeping peacefully DING 6:00 I'm wide awake. Oh well, Figured I'd take this time to really get this blog started. So, now for the encore, the nitty gritty of when I started this blog, there are various reasons but WEIGHT LOSS is #1. Yes, I said weight loss. I'm sure this blog theme is tired and played out but this is much more for my benefit than anyone else's. I want to be able to track where I am and if I'm struggling a particular day I want to be able to take a look back and see where I've come from and the hard work it has taken me to get to be better.

Again, I'm 28 (will be 29 this year) and I've always struggled with weight, the earliest age I can remember to I was the fat kid. Over the years I've just learned to accept it instead of really try to do anything about it. This past year is the first time I've spent the entire year trying to change for the better. My transformation started in January 2011. I vowed to get healthier (as I think we all do around the new year) so I stared Weight Watchers. Once again, my entire life has revolved around diets. My dad would always get depressed about his weight and put the family on weight watchers and then when he got happier about his weight he'd (we'd) stop. He was the cook of the family so if dad didn't cook healthy I wasn't about, at such a young age, to start cooking for myself so what dad made was what you ate. Year after year this is how things went. I'd lose 20 lbs and we'd all stop and then slowly but surly I'd put it back on. Yes, I was taught pieces of how to loose the weight but being so young I didn't have the full picture. Being able to reflect now I can see that. It's more about getting yourself in the right mind frame that it's a life style change and not just a diet. This is who I need to be until the end of days. My body was made differently so I need to treat it differently, I can respect that now, let's not say that I'm happy about it but I can respect it. :)

When I moved to Ohio for 4 years (about 2004), I was single, I didn't have to worry about anyone else in the house except for me. I used to go to school in the day and would work a serving job at night so I was moving around a lot. I was at my lowest weight then. To tell you the truth on how I got there I recall eating a 6" Subway club a DAY. I had more will power over food then. I'd go to school and then go to work and didn't really think about food so I usually had a half of a 6" before then (or the full one throughout the day) and then when I'd get home from work I'd have the rest. How horrible is that? It worked though. I have a pair of pajama pants, that I bought. They are a 2X (I usually wore a 3X) but these were SOOOO cute I had to buy them in hopes that someday I'd be able to wear them, it was at that Subway point of my life I was able to wear them.

What happened you ask? I got a boyfriend. :( That was a horrible relationship but the point is I lost sight of my transformation and there was another person in the household. Do we all go out and eat crap food when we're in relationships or has that just been my experience? I still have those PJ pants in my drawer and while I can actually now fit into them I'm not 100% comfortable just yet. I will continue to keep them until one day soon I'm able to wear them comfortably again!

Ok, back to 2011, vowed to get healthier blah, blah, blah. I was doing great. Managed to get about 15-20 lbs off (gee, those seem to be the easiest always, eh? the first 20) and I had stared going to Curves that was in the same block as my work. For those of you not familiar with Curves it's for women only and it is a circuit of exercises where you spend 30 seconds on each machine twice. It's a great concept but gets boring after a while, anyway, I had signed up for their challenge of see who can loose the most in a month pounds and inches. They weighed and measured and off we all went. Their only stipulation was you had to go to Curves 3 times a week. Easy breezy. I was doing Weight Watchers and things were going great. April 1st was the last day of the challenge and also the day I was surprising my husband with a week trip to Disneyland in So. Cal (he'd never been and I was excited). So I went to Curves before I headed into work and got my final weight and measurements and the lady kept telling me how awesome I had done and she had yet to see anyone lose as much as me. In the middle of our Disneyland week (where I was obvi. taking a small break from WW to enjoy my vacation with Danial) I got a text from my work friend of a photo of Curves' dry erase board that announced the winner was me! Yay. Happy day, I had won and was prob. at my lowest weight since being back in Utah (2007). When we returned to Utah from our awesome trip I tried to get back on track but kept yo-yoing up and down. Well, turns out I was pregnant! I found out in May that I was aprox. 5 weeks along (this did not happen on our Anniversary trip but a week before just FYI)! Another happy day! Danial and I had decided to stop the precautions and try for a baby around January and surprise. Needless to say while I did vaguely do Weight Watchers during my pregnancy as to not gain an insane amount I gained exactly 30 lbs putting me at my all time heaviest weight EVER. Here is the photo of me Christmas day 2011, the day I got induced:
This is the only picture that was taken of me standing up like this during my pregnancy and it's both happy and sad (there are pictures of me sitting at my baby shower but I've got gifts on my lap and you can't really see this foolishness). Happy that I won't have a TON of photos around until the end of time reminding me of how heavy I am but also very sad that I didn't get to experience what other pregnant mom's take for granted: photo opportunities with a cute, perfect baby bump. I was ultimately blessed with a perfectly healthy baby which is the most important. Still, I can't help but feel a bit sad.

Now, again, January 2012 I vowed I REALLY needed to get my act together for the sake of my child and my husband. and 2012 I did it!!! After the first week of mommyhood I got on the scale and IT'S A MIRACLE I had lost ALL 30 lbs of the baby weight. Literally, it was just gone. I still can't believe it. So, that left me at pre-pregnancy weight i.e. a long way to go to my ultimate goal, which by the way is 150-160 lbs (a healthy weight for my height of 5'9). 2012 had been my most successful year ever. I dropped an additional 30 lbs. I hit a plateau the last few months where, once again, I was yo-yoing. Lose a lb gain two. Lose 2.5 gain 1, etc. So now, that January new year resolution time has hit and I'm re-focused and feeling better than ever that I can reach my goal. I know this will take another year (after this one)  least which puts us to January 2015 but God willing, I'm going to do this.

My ultimate goal reward will be a full body lift. After an entire life time being spent as a heavy gal I know that that skin will never go back to where it needs to be so I've decided that the full body lift is the way to go. It will be costly and I've started saving but in the end it's what will happen and I really can't wait.

I wore that same pink sweater around umm November 2012 and my how it fit differently. I wanted to wait the full year but I couldn't help it. I looked really awesome. You'll have to trust me because this photo has mysteriously disappeared from my iPhoto and Facebook where I had posted it. Darn. Oh well. I'll wear it again and take another photo soon. :)

Ok everyone, that's the truth and I'm sticking to it. #1 on my goals list is to get to that goal weight by January 2015. I know I can do this.

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