Thursday, October 24, 2013

Today I Feel: Anxious

Have you ever seen one of those charts that asks you how you feel and you are supposed to select which face you feel? Picture that. Today I'm feeling anxious.  Why you ask? Well I promised myself I'd lose another 2 lbs this week and if I lose it wil be the first time in probably 6 months that I have lost 1-2 lbs for two weeks in a row AND it will be my lowest yet. Can I do it? *announcer voice*Will she make it folks? OR will she falter like so many times past? Stay tuned to find out on this week's episode of... "I'm Fat and I know it". * Yes, I played that little number out in my head just now in my announcer voice. :)  Anyway I was pretty jazzed this week and I've been GREAT! Biked everyday, over 2 miles most were 3 or 4 miles, I haven't gone out to eat, I have been under my calories and eaten a few more when the app yelled at me and said I wasn't eating enough, I am anxious not only to see if I lost weight this week but also pretty excited and want to hope for the best but prepare for the worst, as my mother once said to me.

Also, I have found this past year with me being 100% about the diet, point in case this blog. I've been around 29 years and not once have I thought, "Let's make a blog about losing weight!" No. I've lived life, and had ups and downs with my weight but never was so much of my life dedicated to it. This is both good and bad. Good because I feel I didn't waste my life away striving to be something I wasn't currently I was able to throw caution to the wind and just LIVE. Bad because I feel I missed out on some stuff because my weight was limiting and I feel I've just grown more as a person who wants to take care of them selves so they have a better future with their family type deal. I must find the happy medium, wanting to be able to live and not feel so consumed with calories, and points and the number on the scale or if I eat that how many points is it? How many calories is it? "EAT THE DAMN THING, JUST ONE, BUT DON'T DWELL ON IT!" is what the other side of me is saying. Ok, I feel like I'm rambling now, point? I want to live life to the fullest but still attain some of the cautiousness I posses.

On another note, the tattoo is healing well. Took the plastic bandage off today and now it's just try and tender still. It's beautiful! I have no regrets about getting it.

Whipple- OUT.

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